Interview with Leonard Carr on Relationships, Insecurity and Psychotherapy

This week, I interview a brilliant psychologist Leonard Carr who is an expert on personality and relationships and we talk about relationships, insecurity and psychotherapy… this one is not to miss!

Key Takeaways:

  • How to develop an appreciative approach
  • On going with your feelings versus going with your gut
  • There is a lot to learn from toddlers because they live in vulnerability
  • How to become a well-rounded human being
  • On power issues and the weaponization of social media
  • A good relationship has a healthy balance of maintaining one’s sense of self and making space for the other person
  • Leonard’s tips for single people


  • “How you perceive the world… is really a choice, and it’s those choices that inform your experience of life.”
  • “You can only see the world as if for the first time if you’re not bringing old agendas and programs to your current reality.”
  • “[Try not to become] the monster you are trying to find.”
  • “A person has to enjoy life and be happy with wherever you are and whatever phase that you’re in.”
  • “Make a real commitment to understand the greatness of every human being and the value of human dignity…”

Leonard Carr is a clinical psychologist who has over forty years’ experience counseling and psychotherapy in diverse lay-voluntary and professional settings. Internationally recognized as an expert on personality and relationships, he has been cited in books and other publications. A prolific writer and columnist, Leonard has appeared extensively on national and international radio and television and has hosted two of his own radio shows on psychological matters. He is regularly invited to present workshops and talks both locally and internationally. He was the primary psychological commentator on the Oscar Pistorius Trial and during the trial made extensive appearances on radio, TV and in the press. 

Leonard has worked in a diverse variety of settings like schools, hospitals, crisis intervention centers and children’s homes in his early career. 

Leonard is a past chairperson of the South African Association of Marital and Family Therapy. He is an accredited Mediator. He gained extensive experience from being called upon to assess and report on the psychological dynamics in a variety of court cases, many of which contributed to changing the law in South Africa. 

Leonard has developed an integrative perspective on personality that draws on insights from many schools of psychology and spiritual thought and tradition integrated into a comprehensive map of personal development. He runs growth courses and workshops based on his model and its applications to the areas of leadership, organizational functioning, personal growth, dating, marriage, parenting and interpersonal relationships. 

To learn more, go to

You might also enjoy last week’s interview with Dr. Richard Nisbett on social psychology and thinking. Listen here.





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